With all the terrifying force, momentum and glamour of a lubed-up glitterball on the loose, the legendary Eurovision Song Contest is rolling its way towards us at speed. This hypercamp, often eye-poppingly bizarre and occasionally momentous pan-European celebration of music has been broadcast annually since 1956, and continues to delight Europeans and baffle the rest of world in equal measures. Yes, there’s unfair political voting, cringe-worthy orange-skinned presenters with odd accents and terrible timing, obscene expenditure and a peculiar understanding of geography (this year Australia is taking part for some reason). But it’s also one of the greatest and silliest shows on earth, and holds an especially important part in the hearts of the continent’s LGBTQ population, who every year find something just a little more outrageous to sink their teeth into. But what makes the Eurovision Song Contest so gloriously goddamn gay?

It’s been the platform for some epic gay icons and anthems.

Never forget that the Eurovision song contest was the rocket that gave ABBA their stratospheric rise to fame. The cheesey (yet brilliant) Swedes performed pop perfection back in 1974 with “Waterloo”, and the band continued on to produce gay faves like “Mamma Mia” and “Dancing Queen”.

The Eurovision stage was also frequented by a pop diva who might just surprise you. Appearing dressed in what can only be described as a shoulder-pad-tastic-1980s-tutu-mismatch-extravaganza, Celine Dion represented Switzerland in 1988 and was voted victorious. C’est magnifique.

Gina G may have placed second to the Irish in 1996, but her song “Just a Little Bit” became ubiquitous in gay clubs throughout the UK – 1990s trash at its very finest.

There have been genuinely groundbreaking moments.

When Dana International was put forward to represent Israel in 1998, it was considered a huge scandal. No, not because Israel is clearly not in Europe, but because Dana was a post-op transsexual. The people of Europe unanimously signalled their approval by crowning Dana International the winner. According to academic Dr. Peter Rehberg quoted in the Huffington Post: “The gay fan culture existed before that, but it was almost an unspoken thing. With a transsexual winning the competition, Eurovision had its coming out.”

The rainbow flag of acceptance was flown once more as recently as 2014, when bearded beauty and drag queen superstar Conchita Wurst graced the Eurovision stage. Her performance of “Rise Like a Phoenix” was not only a 007-esque power ballad, but served as an almighty “up yours” to countries that didn’t want to see her in the competition – we’re looking at you, Russia. Some networks even wanted to halt broadcasting during Wurst’s offering, but Eurovision insisted they broadcast all or nothing. Ordinary folk across Europe picked up their phones and voted for Austria and thus Conchita. Her empowering victory speech saw her declaring: “We are unity, we are UNSTOPPABLE.”

Things too got super gay and super political with Ukraine’s beautifully bizarre offering in 2007. Drag performer Verka Serduchka was accused of broadcasting anti-Russian sentiment, as “Lasha Tumbai” bears more than a passing resemblance to “Russia Goodbye”. Serduchka insisted this was not the case, and that “Lasha Tumbai” was in fact Mongolian for ‘whipped cream’, which was quickly dismissed by the Mongolian embassy in Russia as “total gibberish”.

And… I mean… just look at some of the performances.

There are strange, demonic, leather-clad, S&M-inspired, high-pitched, wailing, fantastical monsters from Romania…

… violin-wielding Norse hunks with powerful eyebrows, singing about fairy tales whilst men in braces flip around him…

…. shiny Irish twinky twins getting all wet beneath the waterline…

.. this …

… and this…

… and that’s just the tip of one big, glittery iceberg that’s sailing this way this May. Make sure to tune in, get steamingly pissed and enjoy the world’s greatest, gayest extravaganza. Haven’t convinced you? We’ll leave you with this guy…

Sources: Eschoney