While Instagram is a great place to see what kinds of selfies all your best friends are taking, and to distract yourself from work with cute dogs and cats, it remains one of the best places to peep on some of the world’s prettiest Instagays. So to spice up your daily photo scroll, here are Dandy Dick’s picks for the hottest hunks on Instagram this week. Follow now and thank us later.
‘Success’ is an entirely subjective concept, but it feels right to use it to describe Eliad Cohen. By Instagram merits alone, he is among the app’s finest, clocking in at over half a million followers. He’s also an actor, a model and the founder of Gay-ville, a vacation service geared toward his fellow gays. These are all impressive accomplishments, but ‘success’ is most profoundly observed in his physique. Arnold Schwarzenegger making love to a tractor trailer could hardly produce the colossal masculinity of Cohen’s biceps. They’re beautiful, they’re horrifying, they’re hyperreal and surreal, and they are posted for your pleasure on a weekly basis.
William Arthur is a great lion of a man (any reference of bestiality is unintentional). His immense golden beard and wavy locks would strike envy in the heart of Hercules, or at the very least in the heart of that vegan barista who works in the alternative zine café at the end of the street. Hailing from Belgium, Arthur is a model and aspiring musician, whose talents in both of these industries are made quite clear in his posts. Come for his tattoo-sleeved arms, but stay for the snippets of his guitar-accompanied ballads.
So there’s a cute guy named Miguel Santos who makes his living as a photographer. “Good for him,” you might be thinking. He happens to live in Paris, which is “even better for him,” you might be thinking. He’s been established as cute, but the truth of the matter is that he’s incredibly gorgeous, and goes shirtless often, usually while lying on the banks of the Seine. “His life is pretty great,” you might be thinking. But he also has an equally adorable boyfriend, a dog who is so cute that it would melt the iciest heart, and eats meals consisting entirely of Nutella. “Fuck this guy, why does he have it so good?” you might be thinking. And you wouldn’t be wrong for thinking so, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to stop scrolling through his feed.
Browsing through porn star Jonathan Agassi’s Instagram is something of a challenge; his feed is so filled with his various porn star friends and boyfriends that it can be kind of difficult to figure out just which one of these gorgeous people he is. This becomes less of a problem with every second that goes by when thinking about this matter. But despite the crowded cast of characters, Agassi’s cute little face, one that is the very ideal of a classic cub, manages to shine through. There’s also a pug that makes frequent appearances if you needed any more convincing.
An entire Instagram account could be started for Justin Goble’s hair; its swoopy majesty is a coif fit for a king. But the occasional adult film star has other assets that make his account just fine the way it is. For one, he’s a dead ringer for a young Keanu Reeves, strangely satisfying any Point Break fantasies still troubling you from the 1990s. For another, he’s usually in water of some kind, be it a hot bubble bath or at the beach, the latter of which he seems to have infinite time for. Is it jarring to see selfies with his grandma? Sure, but it just means that he’s a guy with a lot of heart.
by Jake Indiana
And who the hell am I? If you’ve been following the blog at all, you may have wondered out of which horny hole this perverted punk has stepped. I won’t reveal too much – a bit of mystery is sexy, right? But a few things may be in order.
First, I was born in that part of the world that most people think is actually Canada, but it’s not. I was born in Alaska. Who would have thought that place could produce more than oil and Sarah Palin – two decidedly unsexy things.
Second, I’m no stranger to sex on screen. I appeared in two arty porn films with DVD releases: one in San Francisco and one here in Berlin. There may be other footage of me out there, but if so, I don’t know where. And yup, I moved to Berlin from gay ol’ San Francisco, where I learned to be a proper fag and how to be a writer all at the same time.
There’s more from San Francisco coming your way via Dandy Dicks, so stay tuned.
But I left San Francisco. And took my heart with me. Five years now in Berlin and I can’t think of a better place to be. I’ve been making it here as a writer ever since and I’m happy to report there’s no going back.
I think I’ve given you enough of the basics. More you’ll just have to find out either through this blog or a little Google. But I hope with that you stick around Dandy Dicks – for this blog and of course, the boys!
Walter Crasshole